Lets face it how we see our self's is how we show our selves to others. We have all heard the saying you have to love your self before you can love someone else, of course there is some truth to that but I have to say some of us just have a need and want to have our love cup filled now and at least my generation we want instant gratification. Haven't we learned all good things to those who wait! Hell why wait when you can have cheap quick food on the go, and you can gain 50 lbs, run to the plastic surgeon and have it sucked out and keep living the cycle. We can now buy McDonalds, drive the car, txt, pick kids up from practice, grab a coffee at Starbucks, chk emails, send fb messages, post all of our thoughts from moment to moment, buy more fast food AND never leave ur car or the sitting position. The only thing shrinking in this story is our pocket books.Our waste lines and blood pressure are going thru the roof. I lived on fast food for a whole week, just feeding me no one else and I spent 145.78 over a 7 day span. Thats a lot of money on food that has done nothing to enhance my body. I then spent a week eating all natural, and at home and planning meals out and not eating on emotions and I spent 201.00 over a 7 day span. Now the normal person would say Lulu I could save 50 dollars by eating fast food, im on a budget I cant afford to eat healthy. I would agree with you. Eating healthy on a budget is hard to do, in Michigan alone 68% of the people in the state is on food stamps or some food assistance. If you have a big family it is easier to buy mac n cheese and feed them all for less. A single woman living on her own averages about 140 a month for food. Our society markets on our needs to be healthy so they write the word organic on something and charge you 4.00 for a loaf of bread. I don't make lots of money I live pay check to pay check as well. I have mouths to feed. RESEARCH I have walked into stores bought things I thought were good for me, etc I had no idea on anything. I again would watch lots of shows and hope to gain some info from them and make it work, I failed many times.
But with every fail I learned some things on how to make my diet, weight loss and fitness work for me and my life and how I can teach with it, and help others as well as keep me accountable and on track. This is like AA for chubby girls! Hello my name is Lulu and I am a closet eater, and I self destroy my self from good things and I get excited and happy over eating bad and I have low self esteem and issues with my body.. All together now HELLO Lulu and welcome.
Friday, March 30, 2012
Wheres my invisible life announcer!
So we all have see the TV commercial of the dog frantically running thru the house looking for bacon and the male funny voice comes on saying bacon bacon bacon wheres my bacon strips! Well now lets image me running thru my house going donuts donuts donuts. And my funny female voice chimes in wheres my donuts! This is me still til this day. I dream about bad foods, I desire bad foods I LOVE bad foods. Why is it that all the things we should eat are not as tasty or as naughty as the bad foods! Lets face it a carrot no matter how much you mentally pretend it is a Boston cream it is not a Boston cream! I think its funny how much I think about food. I sometimes think I have an issue. Thanks to the fantastic genes I have my metabolism is slower than sap coming out of a tree! So with that said everything I eat has an effect on me. More so than I could have imaged.
So lets look at your body as a car, it needs gas to run right and oil and all the parts need to be clean and in order its a machine well our bods are like this too. I use our belly's as the gas tank and our organs as the oil and our mind as the computer, our arms and legs as the wheels and the body of the car is our center of the body. In a perfect world we would all be chemically sound and all our body parts in amazing order and in good clean working order. However this is not how it works, some of us have chemical imbalances some of us have one leg longer than the other, one boob bigger than the other, some have freckles some have 2 colored eyes. So with all of our differences and different issues comes many new body challenges. Theres No one manual to fix us all. Trust me I wish there was, that's why there is no magical diet that works for everyone! And thank you advertisers who put theses adds out of theses stunning 5'10 blonde's with amazing abs and cut bodies, next to some miracle weight loss pill that shows a semi chubby girl version of them and wow in 12 weeks they lost all this weight. SO first let me say abs like that do not happen with a magic pill, yes you can lose lots of weight but muscles like that cant happen with out training and work and in a few weeks they will not form like that. Second its a gimmick to make people buy a product and of course women have the desire to be desired and loved and thought of as the alpha female so why not spend 30 dollars or more on a pill that claims to make you thin, attractive, more desirable. I am guilty. I am still guilty of looking at theses adds and going wow if i could only look like her! Thanks to photo shop any one can look amazing!
Women can be cruel to each other lol, we don't buy clothes, shoes etc for our man or soon to be callers. We have to prove we are the alpha female to all the other females and instead of peeing on things like dogs due we just spend lots of money, time, energy on making our skin shiner, our hair prettier, longer and thicker, our nails done our clothes the best. All so we have society to except us for who we are.. but are we really that.
If my invisible life announcer came on right now he would say.. "now lulu is in deep thought how do I save the little girls of the world" Then of course the best soundtrack music comes on and I jump up and run off to put on my lulu fitness cape and save all the little girls! Now here I go, cape on to save one little girl stuck in an adult woman's body ready to come out and shine!
So lets look at your body as a car, it needs gas to run right and oil and all the parts need to be clean and in order its a machine well our bods are like this too. I use our belly's as the gas tank and our organs as the oil and our mind as the computer, our arms and legs as the wheels and the body of the car is our center of the body. In a perfect world we would all be chemically sound and all our body parts in amazing order and in good clean working order. However this is not how it works, some of us have chemical imbalances some of us have one leg longer than the other, one boob bigger than the other, some have freckles some have 2 colored eyes. So with all of our differences and different issues comes many new body challenges. Theres No one manual to fix us all. Trust me I wish there was, that's why there is no magical diet that works for everyone! And thank you advertisers who put theses adds out of theses stunning 5'10 blonde's with amazing abs and cut bodies, next to some miracle weight loss pill that shows a semi chubby girl version of them and wow in 12 weeks they lost all this weight. SO first let me say abs like that do not happen with a magic pill, yes you can lose lots of weight but muscles like that cant happen with out training and work and in a few weeks they will not form like that. Second its a gimmick to make people buy a product and of course women have the desire to be desired and loved and thought of as the alpha female so why not spend 30 dollars or more on a pill that claims to make you thin, attractive, more desirable. I am guilty. I am still guilty of looking at theses adds and going wow if i could only look like her! Thanks to photo shop any one can look amazing!
Women can be cruel to each other lol, we don't buy clothes, shoes etc for our man or soon to be callers. We have to prove we are the alpha female to all the other females and instead of peeing on things like dogs due we just spend lots of money, time, energy on making our skin shiner, our hair prettier, longer and thicker, our nails done our clothes the best. All so we have society to except us for who we are.. but are we really that.
If my invisible life announcer came on right now he would say.. "now lulu is in deep thought how do I save the little girls of the world" Then of course the best soundtrack music comes on and I jump up and run off to put on my lulu fitness cape and save all the little girls! Now here I go, cape on to save one little girl stuck in an adult woman's body ready to come out and shine!
How to start
Mind!
I don't know how else to put this! The day you decide you are worth it and the day you decide OK I want to do it, you wont do it. You can buy all the cool fad diets, go to gyms and "work out". All of that wont work unless you have the mind set and actual real want to be skinny. Before I keep going let me say this, when I started this journey, to me skinny was a size 2, and I so wanted to be that size. I desired this perfect body with no flaws.Well OK lets be real, we are all born different we all have different markings and we all have done things to our selves to create new markings. I now look at things like this I want to be fit, I want to be tone, skinny to me now is weak and UN healthy. Another thing I have to keep in mind, I'm not 16, I am a mother with a larger frame. I will never be this little tiny girl. Doesn't matter how much body weight I lose. I must look and act my age, 27 is an amazing age. I am at my prime! I no longer need the bar, or odd social scene I can dress fun, flashy and pretty and not look like I'm 19, but also not like my dear grandmother. So where do women like us shop, how do we feel sexy how do we fit in! Because once our body's inside start feeling good so will we, and we will want to dress the outside as we feel on in the inside. This task for me has been hard, I have no fashion sense so as you drop sizes maybe shop with girlfriends to help re dress you! and a side note TRY EVERYTHING ON BEFORE BUYING IT! every store size is different! DON'T look at size look at how it looks on u! you can be size 26 or size 4 and if you buy the wrong size clothes you can look nasty either way. I have the issue of buying to big size clothes because anyone who has battled weight for a long time knows the mirror doesn't always show you what is really there. Alot of the time I see no change in what I look like, when others stop and go WOW how much weight have you lost!
MIND!! MIND!! MIND! How our heads makes us doing such silly things! So are you ready to lose weight? are you ready mentally? What demons do you face when you think about losing weight!
I don't know how else to put this! The day you decide you are worth it and the day you decide OK I want to do it, you wont do it. You can buy all the cool fad diets, go to gyms and "work out". All of that wont work unless you have the mind set and actual real want to be skinny. Before I keep going let me say this, when I started this journey, to me skinny was a size 2, and I so wanted to be that size. I desired this perfect body with no flaws.Well OK lets be real, we are all born different we all have different markings and we all have done things to our selves to create new markings. I now look at things like this I want to be fit, I want to be tone, skinny to me now is weak and UN healthy. Another thing I have to keep in mind, I'm not 16, I am a mother with a larger frame. I will never be this little tiny girl. Doesn't matter how much body weight I lose. I must look and act my age, 27 is an amazing age. I am at my prime! I no longer need the bar, or odd social scene I can dress fun, flashy and pretty and not look like I'm 19, but also not like my dear grandmother. So where do women like us shop, how do we feel sexy how do we fit in! Because once our body's inside start feeling good so will we, and we will want to dress the outside as we feel on in the inside. This task for me has been hard, I have no fashion sense so as you drop sizes maybe shop with girlfriends to help re dress you! and a side note TRY EVERYTHING ON BEFORE BUYING IT! every store size is different! DON'T look at size look at how it looks on u! you can be size 26 or size 4 and if you buy the wrong size clothes you can look nasty either way. I have the issue of buying to big size clothes because anyone who has battled weight for a long time knows the mirror doesn't always show you what is really there. Alot of the time I see no change in what I look like, when others stop and go WOW how much weight have you lost!
MIND!! MIND!! MIND! How our heads makes us doing such silly things! So are you ready to lose weight? are you ready mentally? What demons do you face when you think about losing weight!
Food Addiction
Hi Gents and Ladies! By popular demand here it is, my blog!
Where to start, how to start, I'm not to sure, so let me give a little back story of me and what I've done. Since I was a little girl I had a weight issue, hello I live in Michigan where most months we have snow on the ground! I grew up with my great grandparents and my mom, and lets face it an Irish Italian family, we like to EAT! Food was used as a form of comfort, when you are sad eat cake, when you are happy eat cake, when you are bored eat cake, or other comfort foods. Food was never taught in my house to be just a basic need thing, food in my house was all about pleasure. As my dear grandma used to say we must make a happy plate and by that she meant have all of the food gone, including 2nd helpings. I enjoyed eating all kinds of food. Most of my family is not society " thin" heck what is society thin anymore. Size negative zero.
Of course I had to go to school, and we all know kids, those darn peers of ours can be so cruel. I was called every fat persons name they could come up with.. and of course Betsy sounds like Bessy, so guess what I was called, along with boofer, betsy wetsy and the list goes on. So what does any girl do when sad and depressed EAT! This is what I did, fast forward many years to 2005. I gave birth to my amazing son, this adorable 7lb wonder, he was cute, pink and sweet, but he so wasn't the 78lbs I gained. I thought after you had a baby that I would walk off the delivery table thin, perfect and back into my size 16 jeans again. Britney Spears did it why cant I. So of course like all other Americans I jumped on the weight loss band wagon, I bought all the books, I tried all the pills, I spent large amounts of money on things like the ab crunch, shake weight, ab doer. and many more I cant think of at this point. I am happy to report with all the money I spent I lost oh about 23 lbs total! Well once I lost some weight and looked less like a beached whale guess what happen.. I got pregnant... was this gods way of laughing at me! :) well after a few miscarriages I of course was unable to cope with my depression, my doctors at the time thought it was a great idea to medicate me. For people who don't know, medication for people with depression, makes you FAT! So that's pretty much a double slap in the face, not only am I depressed now lets pack on 64lbs onto my already low self esteem body and make me deal with that. Time went on, issues with in my life happened like we all have, and for every major life event not only did I go thru them I added on weight to my waist size. I of course jumped on the bandwagon again of weight loss, watched all the shows, bought all the goodies, I was going to be skinny! I bought clothes to small for me, and hung them up and declared I WILL FIT IN THESES BY such and such date. I would go to the gym once a month, and walk on the treadmill and then justify in my head why now I can eat 12 donuts. Oh and I used to sit at home and lay on the floor and lift a leg a few times and go wow, now I can have ice cream with my movie. Does this sound like many of you? Daily I would battle in my head this little war about what not only I looked in the mirror but what and how I felt inside. I hated everything about my body I hate things about my life because I convinced my self I wasn't worth anything. I didn't need anyone else to miss treat me, I was doing just fine on miss treating my self mind body and soul. Many told me I was pretty, Many desired me, but it was never enough to fill my love cup. I was not happy with me. Its a daily battle. Being thinner doesn't make those demons go away. So to make this almost current I got the joy of being a mommy again to a beautiful little girl. And as amazing as she was she didn't sadly come out a 59lb baby. So 2.5 years ago after she was born I decided I was going to break the cycle. I was going to not only teach my little girl about having amazing self esteem but about how to take care of her temple and stop the pain.After a minor health issue after she was born I looked at the mirror and said OK! its time, its time to put aside all the BULL shit reasons and its time to shed the fat suit, it is time to love me again and it is time for me to put me first and take care of me! I was called self fish I was called stupid but I have learned if I'm not happy and well balanced my family is off balance. My kids need their MOMMY around so I needed to do this. Keep in mind this is still an on going battle. I still have slip ups and slip ups are OK, drug addicts do it, people who have food addictions do to! OK lets get down to the niddy griddy!
Where to start, how to start, I'm not to sure, so let me give a little back story of me and what I've done. Since I was a little girl I had a weight issue, hello I live in Michigan where most months we have snow on the ground! I grew up with my great grandparents and my mom, and lets face it an Irish Italian family, we like to EAT! Food was used as a form of comfort, when you are sad eat cake, when you are happy eat cake, when you are bored eat cake, or other comfort foods. Food was never taught in my house to be just a basic need thing, food in my house was all about pleasure. As my dear grandma used to say we must make a happy plate and by that she meant have all of the food gone, including 2nd helpings. I enjoyed eating all kinds of food. Most of my family is not society " thin" heck what is society thin anymore. Size negative zero.
Of course I had to go to school, and we all know kids, those darn peers of ours can be so cruel. I was called every fat persons name they could come up with.. and of course Betsy sounds like Bessy, so guess what I was called, along with boofer, betsy wetsy and the list goes on. So what does any girl do when sad and depressed EAT! This is what I did, fast forward many years to 2005. I gave birth to my amazing son, this adorable 7lb wonder, he was cute, pink and sweet, but he so wasn't the 78lbs I gained. I thought after you had a baby that I would walk off the delivery table thin, perfect and back into my size 16 jeans again. Britney Spears did it why cant I. So of course like all other Americans I jumped on the weight loss band wagon, I bought all the books, I tried all the pills, I spent large amounts of money on things like the ab crunch, shake weight, ab doer. and many more I cant think of at this point. I am happy to report with all the money I spent I lost oh about 23 lbs total! Well once I lost some weight and looked less like a beached whale guess what happen.. I got pregnant... was this gods way of laughing at me! :) well after a few miscarriages I of course was unable to cope with my depression, my doctors at the time thought it was a great idea to medicate me. For people who don't know, medication for people with depression, makes you FAT! So that's pretty much a double slap in the face, not only am I depressed now lets pack on 64lbs onto my already low self esteem body and make me deal with that. Time went on, issues with in my life happened like we all have, and for every major life event not only did I go thru them I added on weight to my waist size. I of course jumped on the bandwagon again of weight loss, watched all the shows, bought all the goodies, I was going to be skinny! I bought clothes to small for me, and hung them up and declared I WILL FIT IN THESES BY such and such date. I would go to the gym once a month, and walk on the treadmill and then justify in my head why now I can eat 12 donuts. Oh and I used to sit at home and lay on the floor and lift a leg a few times and go wow, now I can have ice cream with my movie. Does this sound like many of you? Daily I would battle in my head this little war about what not only I looked in the mirror but what and how I felt inside. I hated everything about my body I hate things about my life because I convinced my self I wasn't worth anything. I didn't need anyone else to miss treat me, I was doing just fine on miss treating my self mind body and soul. Many told me I was pretty, Many desired me, but it was never enough to fill my love cup. I was not happy with me. Its a daily battle. Being thinner doesn't make those demons go away. So to make this almost current I got the joy of being a mommy again to a beautiful little girl. And as amazing as she was she didn't sadly come out a 59lb baby. So 2.5 years ago after she was born I decided I was going to break the cycle. I was going to not only teach my little girl about having amazing self esteem but about how to take care of her temple and stop the pain.After a minor health issue after she was born I looked at the mirror and said OK! its time, its time to put aside all the BULL shit reasons and its time to shed the fat suit, it is time to love me again and it is time for me to put me first and take care of me! I was called self fish I was called stupid but I have learned if I'm not happy and well balanced my family is off balance. My kids need their MOMMY around so I needed to do this. Keep in mind this is still an on going battle. I still have slip ups and slip ups are OK, drug addicts do it, people who have food addictions do to! OK lets get down to the niddy griddy!
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